Faulty Precautions of Peripheral Epiphenomena
We accept that reality exists in an abrupt frenzy of flagrant dysfunction.
Through exhaustive diligence, we've implemented elaborate semantic maneuvers in V-prime, post-postmodernist Dada-esque ingenuity, and the deep dividends of English Qabalistic enumerations to manufacture this Gordian knot disguised as some mentally deficient diatribe on axiomatic donuts and sex-starved avatars of the demiurge.
The most gracious respect, blessings, and all our heart on the numinous denizens of our beloved packet-switching microverse, including the Bleeding-Edge Polymaths, Ultra-radical Counter-Insurrectionists, and Post-Left Anarcho-Myselfists among our readership.
We hope that you will smirk, chortle, and occasionally marvel at the ensuing 23 Faulty Precautions of Peripheral Epiphenomena written with anontologically correct grammar to honor the interminable court chambers of the renowned, revered, and ever-lawful dignitary celebrated by mortals for countless millennia, one who needs no introduction, the noble Goddess Ma'at.
00. Emotionally-Cathartic Anti-Social Mania Influences
This first precept represents the most widely exploited tenet and deprecates the rest in one form or another. This principle recognizes that peak states of awareness can elevate our discarnate projections toward such nebular excursions as the Tunnel of Kteis that Kenneth Grant warns will cross the threshold into Universe B, which epitomizes a highly sought-after infernal retreat for fiends, seers, and madmen.
The Orthodox Chaoist has little to no use for the pageantry associated with ego death. We find the ego far more valuable to overgiving the Great Slack than some mournful casket-carrying precession across town to the sound of lachrymose grief, morose lamentation, and homophonic bagpipes. Let the mystics, gurus, and marabouts enjoy their obsequious interment for the ego; we realize that one's ego possesses many layers. What the bereaved partake in provides only a temporary reprieve from the ego's appetites.
No amount of sacred committals can annul the cordial disorder of the human psyche. Ego death also seems entirely incompatible with the egregious volatility of the apex paradigm of modular magick.
01. Heuristic Approximations of the Variegated Awareness of Selves
This precept carries additional connotations as an accessory to Emo-Cathartic Anti-Social Mania Influences. The fledgling practitioner who refuses to widen their stance and scan a student's finished canvas, looking for insincerity and evasion in the brushstrokes, personifies a straight-up fraud or worse. Where in the name of Yaldabaoth's unsightly girth purse did you get your Bachelor's degree? SCAD? Benedict? Devry??
Nature sets its course on a distinct timetable. What symbolizes nature better than a massive field of conditional probabilities, randomly colliding and dispersing? This includes maintaining a trapeze-like balancing act that we can only venerate heart and soul, as the act seems too dexterous to intuit thoroughly.
Engage, embrace, and empower the continua of elegant alchemical chimera amid your supernal intellect. Appeal to them with your sapient modesty and without fear to take the first step toward apprehending their virtuous salience. We've experienced a lot of rudderless activity stemming from the newbie solitary practitioners who sometimes interpret things they've read in a book or on the internet that sound all fancy-assed and expect to attain that level of practice overnight. We remain the first to complain about the mad state of affairs.
02. Auspicious Behavioral Measures Conjoining Logos and Eros
Psychiatric terminology has extensively disseminated into humanity's collective awareness with such commonplace buzzwords as Jung's "synchronicity" and "archetype" as well as Freud's "ID" and "superego" --- these glorious concepts have found their way into casual conversations as readily as the newest slang for weed.
Due to the prevalence of these inaccuracies, we've uncovered an entirely new caste of irrevocably vapid imbeciles who impart their erroneous twaddle upon one another within public earshot of passersby.
If your attention regarding the early 20th century propels your search for "wisdom" or Hades help us "knowledge," we implore you to investigate the works of Niels Bohr (physics) and Alfred Korzybski (semantics), not Carl Jung and Sigmund Freud. Choose your profound junkies with meticulous resolve.
03. Disassociatives, Deleriants, and DMT
Often it seems that involuntary sobriety or the use of mediocre substances represents the enemy of both career-focused performance states slash work conditions and psychical trance states slash meditational postures.
When faced with an overwhelming requirement for the complete and utter loss of one's vertical and horizontal hold on reality, we turn to those substances that inhibit the functions of the rigid frontal lobe so efficiently that the resulting quality draws us into a spellbinding delirium and toward the familiar arms of Morpheus once bioavailability emerges in earnest.
Remember to take care out there and, most importantly, evade the gaze of the hegemonic demons of the 1% who surveil us for their salaries and report back to their handlers with scandalous info.
04. Simulacra and Simulation
Jean Baudrillard believed that society had grown so permeated with the simulacra of sentient life and so inundated with the constructs of society that all meaning had gotten indisputably more meaningless by its wildly capricious and unstable existence; he called this phenomenon the "precession of simulacra".
Baudrillard claims that "The simulacrum is never that which conceals the truth---it is the truth which conceals that there is none. The simulacrum is true."
This seems an odd place to locate a prominent Chaoist axiom, nevertheless, it reminds us of that hypothetical pupil who realizes truth constantly re-emerges in new forms to replenish its identification as the dominant gravitational property we cling to. Nothing holds truth but lies.
05. Sympathetic Proximity Infection Strategies
Physical contact permits a certain amount of resin or resonance exchange linking the client to the fledgling practitioner, who takes full advantage of this phenomenon by remaining mindful of the secretion processes. The word's etymological root illustrates its relationship to the mysteries: SECRETion.
With the advent of AI, it seems only a matter of time before synthetic cognizance shifts from parsing harmless phraseological errors into the less-than-favorable remote manipulation of American military assets. How many safeguards can programmers and cybersecurity experts anticipate to prepare us for enslavement to our smart kitchen appliances?
06. Obfuscated Cryptogrammatical Nomenclature
Creating entirely new jargon for things (objects, creatures, processes) awards one a degree of synergistic influence over those things. We define things as we experience them, yet self-referential obscurities allow us to privatize inherent definitions while alienating the memeless human citizenry. When a fledgling practitioner releases a memetic epidemic upon their audience in a rephrased slang or seemingly original ideologue, they gain leverage over that audience by short-circuiting their certainties.
This presents the fledgling practitioner with an entry point for further inserting codified blueprints into their proficiencies of consciousness which then replicate deeper into the target's dialectic memeplex.
07. Isogestative Antipersonnel Nanotoxins
This precept follows the hypothesis that our consciousness acts like a non-local phenomenon---an astutely engineered spectacle that operates through morphogenic fields. We act only as receivers of information and intelligence. No data gets stored in our skulls since the brain only acts as a signal converter, descrambler, or listening device.
The animistic zeitgeist of former aeons declares that words and names contain power akin to casting magical spells. This concept seems almost too cyclopean to spend time discrediting, but we must admit that this decrepit issue carries metaphysical weight.
The fledgling practitioner often finds themselves at the mercy of their perceptions under the auspices of technology's current hyperreal emergence from some as-of-yet unmanifest experiential algorithm.
Overcome yourself (your reactions, habits, and conditioning) ahead of any other principle, and your heart will remain almost as prepared for the unexpected as a dutiful soldier sent off to war. Sure they puke into their mouths a little on the journey toward the war, but they also maintain their sober composure off the flavor and fumes from their stomach acids.
08. Neurocognitive Autoindexing Wetware Actuation Consoles
Our minds contain much more of a forgettery than some bottomless storage space for experiential events. Although, the information we deliberate does not usually get wiped clean from the neuroprocessor. Trauma can make our memories less accessible (or more accessible, in other cases). Still, we can reconstruct them when we learn to exert a degree of control over our faint cognitive activity.
The contents of the human mind allegedly occupy about 25 petabytes of data.
The techniques involved in sleight of mind, suspension of disbelief, and self-fulfilling prophecies offer us a means for casual amnesia; however, no one seems certain of the necessity of subverting the psychic censor (if indeed one exists). Technological gadgetry will soon offer us an entirely new means for storing, sorting, replicating, erasing, accessing, and modifying our memories.
Some folks worry about robots taking their jobs. What about how robots have replaced your neighbors, friends, and family? You spend all day on that less-than-covert surveillance device you call a phone. This illustrates the insidious operability of the mind control devices in our back pockets.
09. Inertial Planetary Drift Revalidation
Suppose the fledgling practitioner can not readily pinpoint the darling eidolon in their stable. It'll likely turn out as the most abhorrent Ephialtean phantasm of the bunch. We locate the fugly brat, and all of a sudden, it alters its appearance and shrieks loudly in a high-pitched yowl of artless enthusiasm. The constant barrage of numinous caterwauling inevitably turns into the wonk wonk wonking of Charlie Brown's teacher due to the specific frequency emitted by the specter, which paralyzes the fledgling practitioner's analytical faculties.
Orthodox Chaoists can communicate internally with loose fragments of their ego (servitors, egregores, etc.) and establish behavioral anchors with these semi-autonomous splinters of their perception. Given generous and patient preprogramming, these entities can also nudge reality to one's benefit. When the ontological paywall seeks to separate us from the rest of our troupe, we must gather our strength and wits, slithering into the unknowable jungles of mediocrity as serpents shedding our skin to save face.
10. Frenzied Colorectal Assault (the 11th degree)
Fledgling practitioners possess the incentive to keep silent concerning the core elements of their augoeides' bestial automata (tutelary deities long bereft of credulity, cretinous personal daimons, and saccharidic dough-baked HGAs).
Suddenly, our task compels us to implant some awkweird nanocircuitry of questionable origins under the wrist of an affectless technoplegic sysadmin with glaring localization issues on their resume, not to mention their dissimilated background of acute psychosocial underdevelopment starting in their formative years.
11. Molecular Reconstruction Synthesis
One of the numerous obstacles preventing science from offering us a complete formula for time travel (aside from military-industrial withholds, and the iffy nature of wormholes in general) remains the inability to restore the physical body after molecular disassembly upon arrival at the event horizon.
This edict offers us a glimpse into the applications of Autotheistic Neurochemical Asceticism through pneuma-based atavistic integration, aggrandized possession by Legion, and maximization of the ceaseless regurgitation of foundational spirit-summoning catalogs.
12. Autotheistic Neurochemical Asceticism
Every fledgling practitioner has constructed their own ornately unique MMORPG universe (that constitutes their living arrangements), which rarely gets constructed using the same metrics as other fledgling practitioners. The emergent Z(enseider)Z construct embodies the Bardo Tellus Server, a meme rendered by the visionary overseer of the shutter release, the hotshoe, and the aperture, Devon Jurassic.
People adhere to consensual belief structures out of fear of repercussions and the frivolity of sheer convenience. We may all possess opinions, assholes, and mobile data plans, but as of yet, no one can claim any of that equipment in any way useful in engineering idiosyncratic realities. It seems beneficial to remember that identity and memory result from chemistry.
13. Galactic Isolation Narratives
This precept refers to the "Many Worlds Theorem" of Hilbertian space existing outside of reality's primary, auxiliary, and more subtle ternary planes. This mandate applies to our hypnagogic pre-sleep state, r.e.m. dream state, and hypnopompic awakening state. Each day offers us the chance for the complete and utter transmutation of awareness utilizing mnemonic psyber-triggers, characteristic personality anchors, and motivational affirmation protocols.
This precept goes hand-in-hand with Heuristic Approximations of the Variegated Awareness of Selves which exalts the multiplicity of archetypal intelligentsia inherent to our first-person shooter mode of perception.
14. Biointegrated Cybernetic Enchantments
Our work here on our beloved packet-switching microverse tends to rid us of the unnecessary formulas for paradigmatic technologies that we often associate with so-called pathwork even though that phrase derives from a strictly Kabbalistic etymological diaspora.
Even when a particular mode of belief or behavior model enables a fledgling practitioner to manifest their desires and achieve specific results, it does not make that belief or behavior "true" or "real" in the strictest sense of the word.
Refrain from confusing predictability with definitive techniques, as none exist. Use it if it works for you, but do not conflate any experiential phenomena with ultimate reality. Such apparent answers more commonly imply inertial obstacles one has yet to overcome.
15. Flagrant Intentional Accidents
This precept seems self-explanatory and the Zeedept will immediately recognize its importance and will likely emit an eerie cackle as their initial reaction. The fledgling practitioner who wields the chaos thunderbolt without mortal remorse for their deeds or objectives represents a morphologic prototype of occultural achievement. We need no justification to heal, hurt, or hang out. This synthesizes the above three precepts through fallacious association with their inimical derivations.
16. Overexertion Resulting in Synaptic Recursion
The most arrogant revision of the memeless human citizenry seems epitomized by the idea that such creatures do not receive, process, or execute data streams solely based on apparent external stimuli.
Formal education teases the memeless human citizenry with such inept objectives as "experience," the accomplishment of a degree, and intellectual sophistication. They'll talk the talk, say their masters.
As Crowley reminds us in his hyperbolic jaunt Diary of a Drug Fiend, these institutions don't teach you that talking does not involve thinking. The chattering monkey mind does not account for any strain of genius that the memeless human citizenry may find themselves unwittingly capable of.
17. Unverified Personal Gnosis
The inherent duality of consciousness superimposes a stigma of such undeniable simulation that many of the so-called "spiritually-inclined" memeless human citizens who claim some form of "enlightenment" also attempt to testify that matter (composed of nothing more than informational fields assembled by bundles of energy) resolves toward an all-encompassing oneness of existence.
Metaphysical scapegoats in the form of spiritual bypassing have now reached the status of ontological accolades. How quaint! To deny Vorticitating Hypersphere Cosmology implies that one has merged with the cosmic totality and no longer requires one's body. No living, breathing fledgling practitioner would ever sincerely attest to this.
18. Palindromic Reciprocal Integers
This flaw represents a commonly misoverstood principle of separability existing among irrelativistic dimensionality and virtual covarying scale. This separability provides a sound logical foundation to reaffirm the Theory of Everything that exists in the expanse separating general relativity from quantum mechanics.
Any paradox can and will occur when scale conversion ceases to compromise the fledgling practitioner's mensural apprehension of quantum gravity amid the integral cohesion of String theory (M-theory), which proposes six or seven dimensions of hyperspace. Combined with the four fundamental forces alleged to occur post-Big Bang (time-space and energy-mass), we postulate about ten or eleven total dimensions.
The separability among irrelativistic dimensionality and virtual covarying scale acts as a barrier separating two unconditional frames of reference. Irrelativistic dimensionality reciprocates itself in the middle of any two unconditional frames of reference that will support its severe detachment, while also remaining asymmetric to themselves concerning the conversion bounded by virtual covarying scale and absolute invariable metrics.
19. Auspicated Probability Manipulation
To survive, let alone engineer reality, one must scrutinize every aspect of one's multiverse until the malleable substance of this hologrammatic projection starts to buckle at the seams.
This embodies yet another reason why Orthodox Chaoists so rarely identify as such. Their continuing associations with sex and death impel them to lose sight of where our species derived its sentient existence. Chicken or egg? Ideally, we'd rather herald conception or expiration as they represent a near-identical ingress and egress leading to and from this dimensional expanse of stars, planets, and nebula. Shifts in perception enhance the fledgling practitioner's ability to continue wielding their inner chaos.
Often enough all they continue wielding is clumsily unacknowledged trauma. This type of misfortunate transference of power can burrow deep into the victim's central nervous and endocrine systems and penetrate the core of its skeletal anatomy down to the very fibers of its dermis and musculature. Not to mention its presence in the impalpable avenues of unyielding cerebral margins.
This precept also illustrates why the hyper-neotenous energetically-omnivorous non-sanguinarian psybervampires exploit the two-legged mouth-breathing non-Zee meme alien for its spectral broth of preternatural essence.
20. Unrefined Therioamorous Perversity
Sometimes known as Epidynamic Sex Magick, this precept sets steep valuations on bodily autonomy and inviolability (including psychic autonomy and inviolability) that pivot aggressively against most conventional views of body, mind, and soul. In the orthosexual world, romance often gets portrayed as some conquest. The caveman violently subdues the cavewoman with a club (the "wooing" weapon emerges as phallic, of course). He then drags her off to a secluded cave to sexually abuse her. Not exactly love at first knockout blow.
In reiki, reflexology, shiatsu, etc. no difference exists separating a symbiote from a parasite at the energetic level. It remains up to each individual to prove they respect, honor, and revere their symbiotic partner. Vibes mean everything. If your vibe manhandles and manipulates what you don't regard then you endure as a serial psychic rapist and an outright parasite. The symbiotic partner will earn the honor and respect of their partner by proving that their heart possesses the deepest reverence their soul can manage. Upon meeting these conditions, an exchange of the rarest love imaginable may transpire and thus connect symbiotic partners. A love that will always feel incomparable to the basic af physical lusts which embody the animalistic lower self or Nephesh.
21. Vorticitating Hypersphere Cosmology
Peter J. Carroll's work in theoretical physics with Hypersphere Cosmology predicates an alternative to the expanding universe of the standard LCDM-Big Bang model. In Hypersphere Cosmology, a universe finite and unbounded in space and time possesses a slight positive spacetime curvature. This curvature appears as an acceleration that accounts for the redshift of distant galaxies and stereographic projections of radiant flux from outlying sources, making them seem dimmer and more distant.
In Hypersphere Cosmology, the universe does not expand, no big bang occurs, singularities do not occur, and dark matter and dark energy do not exist. The findings provide alternate interpretations of such hypotheses.
22. Base-36 Irrational Numeric Telemetry
For a nominal fee, we will trap and safely archive: ghosts, spirits, phantoms, wraiths, spooks, shades, shadow people, hat men, cryptids, slendermen, ghouls, demons, ogres, zombies, boggards, bogeymen, barghests, wights, haunts, revenants, qlippoth, doppelgangers, elementary particles, wavicles, tachyons, quanta, hellhounds, chthonians, and other things that go bump in the night, or things that have resulted from the careless and juvenile use of tiktok psychics, ella enchanted, uplifting memes shared unironically, angel numbers, monster high, vision boards, tantric celibacy, delta-8 gummies, psychotropic benadryl, or anything published by llewelyn.
Evoke happy chemistry: ritualize self-harm devoted to Pain and Depression in a very purposive, solemn, and then raucously hilarious yet deranged episode. We intend to catch the rebound of Pain and Depression which arrives as an autonomic response to our (feigned) desperation. The body works in delirious waves.
If one part exhibits distress the body's response team sends aid. We expect a visceral wave of Pleasure and Elation (dopamine and norepinephrine) to permeate our days. So, Pain and Depression receive placation now and tomorrow until our final eve.
Self-care means everywhere. Head, heart, and hole.*
*the above-stated "hole" represents an allusion to the toroidal inner markabat-masjid with which our astral double soars and glides throughout the borderless boundaries of the ultra-sidereal omni-stratum, which reminds us of Frater Solomon's millennial decree that "every man and every woman: a black hole." These things often work hyperstitiously (i.e., through self-fulfilling prophecy).
As phenomenological prophets of the Aeon of Ma'at, we tirelessly recapitulate our False Fate to eventually reach the Theriomorphosis process and empty out our overgiving of the Great Slack.
Conversely, aspiring to your True Will to reach the K&C of your Augoeides and fulfill your undertaking of the Great Work embodies an inferior outer order exoteric version of the above stated mechanism. Work implies handing over your every instance of leverage. Your cost must not outweigh your ability to create profit for your employer, lest you become a liability to those who pay your salary to own you.
With Slack, one’s subtle influence accelerates them into a position of control over their work by applying their natural force of action, which creates a near-unstoppable bursts of momentum. The movement feels like arriving at a state of perfect rest in a seemingly inertial flow state of moment to moment articulation of power.
The resulting achievement of mass control over one’s own degree of leverage gets counter-balanced by one’s nominal velocity, which multiplies exponentially with each pinch of interest on every resource transactionally deposited.
We decontaminated the preceding text with anontologically correct grammar known as V-Prime in sincere consideration of your psychic inviolability.
We used to always call it “Advanced Semantics,” but we see more clearly after writing this janky lard that it should get called Amazeballs Semantics from now on.